Author: larswrites

A frugal wanderer. Agriculturist. Lover of life and people. Adventure seeker. A typical human being who tries to live a healthy life and is occasionally lost in time and space.

How do I say goodbye?

I was driving and listening to the random songs the radio plays and I heard this song the first time. I didn’t know it at all. The lyrics were sung with clarity and emotion. It hit me. And, I realized tears were rolling down my cheeks, and the road became blurry, so I had to pull over.

It was the grief I had been delaying from a loss I will never recover. The song was beautiful, but each word was like a cruel premonition I was glad not to hear before the bad news came to me.

It was the nightmare I would wake up due to wetness on my face. I never wanted it to happen.

The song is from Dean Lewis, entitled, HOW DO I SAY GOODBYE. And it goes like this (with my remarks for each line)…

Early morning there’s a message on my phone (It was 4am CDT when I received the message)
It’s my mother saying, “Darling, please come home” (It was my kuya saying, tatay is gone, could you come home?)
I fear the worst, but how could you leave us all behind? (My worst fear is now reality)
There’s so much to say but there’s so little time (There are so many things I dreamt for him, but little time to turn them into life)

So how do I say goodbye (How do I really say goodbye?)
To someone who’s been with me for my whole damn life? (From birth until 2021, I was with him)
You gave me my name and the color of your eyes (Literally, he gave me my name cos my mom was still unconscious from the C-section)
I see your face when I look at mine (I see your nose when I look mine, an insecurity that I learned to embrace)
So how do I, how do I, how do I say goodbye? (How do I?)

When I couldn’t, you always saw the best in me (He was my number 1 cheerleader)
Right or wrong, you were always on my side (When I doubt myself, he was there to lift me up)
But I’m scared of what life without you’s like (I couldn’t imagine my life without you, but then it’s my life now)
And I saw the way she looked into your eyes (I saw the way you looked into us, to live our lives and not worry about you anymore)
And I promise if you go, I will make sure she’s alright (I could say that nanay looks alright)

So how do I say goodbye (I still can’t)
To someone who’s been with me for my whole damn life? (You can’t expect me to. It was 3 decades of my life you were with me, loving me unconditionally)
You gave me my name and the color of your eyes (Luzviminda, dark brown eyes – all came from you)
I see your face when I look at mine (I see the love you gave when I don’t desperately crave for another guy’s attention)
So how do I, how do I, how do I say goodbye? (In time)

And there’s no way you could ever let me down (You left, but you fought a good fight)
Gonna steal some time and start again (No time to steal, but will start again without you)
You’ll always be my closest friend (The first man who showed me how love should look like)
And someday we are gonna make it out (I will try to make it out of this life for you)
Just hold the light, just hold the light (You’d always be that star shining the brightest to light me up when life is getting dark)

So how do I say goodbye
To someone who’s been with me for my whole damn life?
You gave me my name and the color of your eyes
I see your face when I look at mine
So how do I, how do I, how do I say goodbye?
So how do I, how do I, how do I say goodbye?

I hate the rain

People often ask, what is your favorite season?

When you grew up in a tropical place where you only have sunny or rainy days, I bet they’ll choose summer and would say they hate the cold. You can’t be surprised to know that they like all four seasons – summer, spring, summer, and fall, as I do.

That is why it is difficult to choose only one of these four. But, if asked what season I hate the most, in the blink of an eye, I know the answer right away.

Let’s go back to the tropical place where we get 20+ typhoons every single year, and we only have sunny and rainy days — without hesitation, I would say that I hate the rainy days. No offense to farmers in drier places who need water for their crops. Rain gives me anxiety, and I guess no one likes that feeling.

When I started living in a landlocked place with much less rainfall than where I grew up, I met people who found calm and solace in the sound and smell of rain. With a smile on their face, they would ask me if I felt the same. My answer has always been a NO.

Plants love it. But I am far from being a plant.

I played in the rain as a kid, but as I grew up, I saw how it had been destroying our house and peace of mind — the reason you won’t find any rain sound in my playlist despite claiming it to put you in sleep.

For me, rain often meant strong winds trying to peel off the iron roof of our house, heavy downpour leaking and wetting our beds, and eventually, flooding damaging our things (notebooks, clothes, etc.).

Strong winds made my heart beat 180 times per minute as I heard the creek coming from the roof, indicating that our roof might get blown away. The continuous howling of the wind at night was our alarm clock with no cancel/stop button, waking up the whole family. Next thing I knew, we were all grabbing wires tied to the roof and its foundation and helping each other save our house for the next 3 to 5 hours until this typhoon passed by our town.

Heavy downpours of rain would mean that we must try to sleep with a bucket next to us to catch the water dripping from the roof, albeit not rest until the heaviest part of the rain had passed. We needed to check every minute if the rain was about to come into our house.

Then, there was the flooding. It meant we needed to lift things like our fridge, couch, television, etc., things we find important, so they would not be damaged by the flood. It also meant to expect snakes, toads, or crickets to swim inside the house to find shelter, which added to my anxiety during typhoons. Ugh.

I hate the rain.

When Life Gives You Tangerines: Unsolicited Thoughts

I don’t know if it was due to hormones or mainly the film that made me cry the week I was binge-watching When Life Gives You Tangerines. Nonetheless, the film gave me a better look at the perspective of a father, mother, and child of different ages and generations about life and its inevitable struggles, especially if you are not from a wealthy family.

I didn’t get why couples (Ae-sun and Gwan-sik) who grew up poor and had a difficult life would be so reckless to rush into a relationship and give birth to children (Geum Myeong, Eun Myeon, Dong-Myeong) while they are still struggling themselves. For me, it is selfish, but the silver lining is that kind of love is rare. A love that is patient, conquers all, and endures hardships. The love between Ae-sun and Gwan-sik, and their love for their kids – is the kind of love not everybody can and will experience.

As their children, I hope you soon forgive them, as that’s what they knew right then, and they tried their best to raise us with their best knowledge. Be gentle to your parents and love them every day, despite their imperfections.

To be continued…

My Solo Travel to Grand Canyon

Solo travel may seem like a challenge, but who knows, it could be an adventure of a lifetime? I wasn’t planning to go solo, but my friends’ stars didn’t align with mine. Then, I had the chance, so I took it. I swear I was freaking scared since I will be alone and it will be my first time, but I couldn’t say pass with Grand Canyon!

Why Travel Solo?

Postcard-like scenery: When I went there, my first stop was just breathtakingly unbelievable – it was like being inside a postcard. The colors are just stunning, which makes you think how amazing the world is.

Doable for quick or long trip: I was only there for a day, very quick, but worth it. You can enjoy these views for half a day, but I recommend a longer stay to fully experience the canyon.

Self-discovery: This place made me realize that I can conquer places I thought were impossible to get my feet on. I realized that I am capable of things that my mind can conceive. I just need to work hard and have a little pixie dust of luck.

Must-See Spots in the Grand Canyon for Solo Travelers:

  1. South Rim – The most popular viewpoint for the Grand Canyon. You can’t miss the iconic Mather Point or Yavapai Point for unforgettable photo ops!
  2. Hiking the Bright Angel Trail – A classic Grand Canyon hike! It’s one of the most accessible, taking you deep into the Canyon for jaw-dropping views.
  3. Grand Canyon Skywalk – For thrill-seekers, walking on this glass bridge with a view straight down to the Canyon floor is a once-in-a-lifetime experience!
  4. Desert View Watchtower – Experience a less crowded spot with incredible views and an incredible historical landmark.
  5. Havasu Falls – If you’re looking for something off the beaten path, hiking to Havasu Falls is a unique experience filled with crystal-clear waters and breathtaking scenery.

Tips for Solo Travelers:

  • Safety First: Always let someone know your itinerary and check-in regularly. Cell service is limited in many parts of the park.
  • Pack Smart: Bring plenty of water, snacks, and sunscreen—staying hydrated and protected from the sun is crucial.
  • Plan Your Stay: From camping to luxury accommodations, there’s a place for everyone! Consider staying at Grand Canyon Village for easy access to all major sights.
  • Respect Nature: Stay on marked trails, leave no trace, and take only memories.
  • Solo but Not Alone: The Grand Canyon is a popular destination, so you’ll never truly be alone. Take advantage of ranger-led programs to meet other like-minded travelers!

What to Pack for Your Solo Grand Canyon Trip:

If you have a car, then you can overpack. But you do not need to. Backpacking is very possible. Please note that you will need to bring the following and be prepared for extensive hiking.

  • Sturdy hiking boots
  • Water and/or sports drink
  • Sunscreen
  • Camera (no need for fancy ones, your phone’s enough)
  • Power bank (because there’s a lot of images to capture)
  • First-aid kit and any personal medications
  • Light jacket for chilly mornings and evenings
  • Snacks like energy bars

Final Thoughts:

The Grand Canyon is one of the most majestic places on Earth, and there’s no better way to experience it than on your own terms. Solo travel here isn’t just about seeing a natural wonder; it’s about embarking on a journey of personal growth, adventure, and connection with the wild.

Ready to take the leap? The Grand Canyon is waiting!

#SoloTravel #GrandCanyonAdventure #TravelAlone #ExploreTheWorld #BucketListTravel #NatureLovers #SoloTravelJourney

I am 32, and I just found what I want in life, but it comes with uncertainties.

As in all we want to do in life, it always comes with uncertainties. I have been hearing this tiny voice in my heart – to do something way different from my path now.

I am not disclosing it yet because I want to see if I will get that point. Just imagine this hypothetical scenario: you finished your medical degree after 12 years of focusing on this path since you thought you wanted to do this for the rest of your life, and you realized one day, when you were 32, that you wanted to be an airplane pilot.

Would you change your career? You are uncertain whether you will become a pilot, and if you do not succeed, how can you bounce back? I know 32 is not old, but it is also not young. I am scared. But I do not want to regret not trying what that tiny voice in my heart is asking. It looks so daunting, but then I am more than capable of restarting again (except financially, though I always believe that if there’s a will, there’s a way).

Let me reflect on this post and see if I will make it 10 years from now. I hope I make it to something my body, mind, and soul crave for and will enjoy doing.

22-day Europe itinerary (come with me as a first timer)

My January 2025 was filled with happy memories from our 22-day Europe tour and here is our itinerary that you can copy on your upcoming trip.

Day 1 – Athens, Greece (arrived at 7am in the airport); visited Roman Agora and, Acropolis.

Day 2 – Flew from Athens, Greece to Rome, Italy; walked around the city since we arrived late.

Day 3 – Vatican City; attended the Sunday’s mass and walked around then went back to Rome.

Day 4 – Rome, Italy; went Italian food crawling, visited the Colosseum.

Day 5 – Pisa, Italy; went to the leaning tower of Pisa then traveled to Venice, Italy at night.

Day 6 – Venice, Italy; walked around Venice, rode the Gondola ($90 for two people).

Day 7 – Milan, Italy; went to Duomo di Milano and Sforzeco Castle museum.

Day 8 – Train to Switzerland; went and walked around Luzern and Zurich in Switzerland.

Day 9 – Traveled from Switzerland to Munich, Germany; Walked around the town.

Day 10 – Munich, Germany; walked around the town and did German food crawl.

Day 11 – An hour away from our hotel in Munich, Germany, was a frozen lake we went to.

Day 12 – Traveled from Munich, Germany to Frankfurt, Germany; walked around Frankfurt.

Day 13 – Met a friend in Frankfurt, Germany; more food crawling.

Day 14 – Walked around the town Frankfurt, Germany. Stayed here longer because of a friend and I got my Schengen visa in this country as well.

Day 15 – Amsterdam, Netherlands; visited Anne Frank’s Secret Annex and Red Light District.

Day 16 – Brussels, Belgium; Belgian food crawling and chocolate tasting, went to Grand Palace.

Day 17 – Ghent, Belgium; had Belgian waffles, went to Gravensteen Castle.

Day 18 – Calais, France; had crepes, walked around the shore.

Day 19 – Paris, France; went to the Eiffel tower and Louvre museum.

Day 20 – Nazare, Portugal; went to Praia de Salir do Porto, Portuguese food crawl.

Day 21 – Obisos and Lisbon, Portugal; went to a town surrounded with walls, did seafood crawl.

Day 22 – Barcelona, Spain; went to Sagrada de Familia, traveled to the airport to go back home.

The key is to find a hotel near the train station or the places you want to visit. Also, if you arrive earlier than the check-in, do not be shy to ask the hotel person if you can leave your things with them. Most of them let us leave our things, and we walked around without our bags.

The best travel luggage: 22 days of non-stop travel in the train, taxi, and airplane (carry-on and check-in).

Disclaimer: THIS IS NOT SPONSORED. I just found the one!

It is the one. The best luggage for me at this point. The brand? MONOS!!! The best investment for your money.

See that? I overpacked it for 22 days, as evidenced by the bulge, and rolled for kilometers. My boyfriend dragged it because I’m a travel princess. LOL. And I kid you not, he pulled it carelessly and dragged it down the stairs each time we moved from one place to another.

This luggage was not only in the carry-on, but we also used it for check-in. And we all know that check-in luggage is treated badly. It didn’t have a great time in taxis and trains, but it held up so well.

Although this is not cheap compared to other luggage brands, it is not as expensive as Rimowa and it is worth every penny. Just choose a color that does not easily get dirty.

The best January

The first month of 2025 has been good to me. I traveled to places. Met a lot of people. Ate lots of different food – pasta, cheese, and pastries to name some. Traveling is a fun way of learning. January made me appreciate life again.

Why am I and will be MIA…

MIA – missing in action. I have been MIA in the past few months. To the self that promised herself to be more consistent on her blog writing, I apologize as this present self has to be present in her priorities the moment is asking for. I need to cram writing my thesis and it is not easy. I will be MIA for the next weeks again and I hope to get back after this battle I am fighting. LOL. Ciao!