December 16: retail therapy (is not therapeutic in the long run)

Who else are guilty of buying stuff to feel good after getting super stressed or sad?

They call it retail therapy. A small dose of instant happiness from getting something you like.

I did this for a couple of months because I was sad and stressed. It gave me a ray of hope and small spark of joy. But it only lasted for a day or two. I ended up having to many things that I do not necessarily needed.

Buying things to make us happy is not bad especially if you’ve worked hard for it. But, if you are doing this just to alleviate negative emotions, you have to reconsider you purchasing decisions.

A retail therapy is a band-aid solution. It will never cure your wounded soul. Perhaps for quick moment you’d forget that you are hurting but this won’t solve the problem.

We have to understand why we are sad, stressed, or hurting. Acknowledge what we are feeling. Think whether we have control over it or not. Face it. Deal with it. Retail therapy is a form of escape. Stop running away from it. It is there to contribute to your growth. Look at the good side of the situation you are in and have a positive mindset. Not easy but doable.

December 15: commitment (is saying yes and doing your 101%)

Commitment.

One word that is easy to say but not to execute.

When we say yes to something, we have to give your 101%. Give the discipline and effort it requires.

Saying yes to a task would me giving your focus and attention to that regardless how difficult or easy it is. If you need to triple check something just to make sure your craft is something you will be proud of looking back.

Do not settle in mediocre work because you are not born to be an average, you are born to live your full potential.

December 14: Self-care (vs. Self-protection)

Yesterday, I told myself that I will just take an hour nap and then do my things because I was really sleepy. I ended up sleeping until morning and broke my writing streak. 😦

I should’ve written my yesterday’s entry but I chose sleep. I always choose sleep regardless of the consequence I will face the next day. Up until this point I am not sure if I am choosing sleeping as self-care or self-protection.

But, what’s the difference? Sleeping because you are tired after working your ass out is self-care while sleeping to escape a task is self-protection. The latter is cowardice creating regretful consequences. Self-care is being smart of knowing when to rest to have the energy to be the best version of yourself.

Yesterday was a self-protection. I was not brave. I gave in to the discomfort my brain was telling me. Something I have to work harder.

December 13: choose your happy

I have been meeting people sharing things that really brighten up my dark days lately. Building up a routine in the middle of catching up with backlogs seems to be a pit of darkness for me at this point. And when you are at this phase of your life, you will appreciate all words of encouragement that could give you some rays of light.

So today, I met this car dealer guy who has a yoga master daughter and I jokingly asked him if he does yoga since I told him that yoga calms my mind when I am super stressed – and I am almost everyday stressed in the past weeks but could not do yoga. He had a beautiful answer: “I do not do yoga. I choose my happy. Life is short.”, he told me as well the story of a girl who likes pageants and that girl lost the competition 5 times and almost gave up but on her 6th try, she won.

Most of the time, we are the ones choosing the things that would make us sad or stressed. In life we have to learn the difference between the things that you can control and the ones you cannot. In both cases, choose yourself, and choose your happy. Life is either fast or just too short and therefore, you better learn how to enjoy it even in the middle of the most stressful situation.

December 12: fail to plan (and you plan to fail)

I was talking to this old guy about graduating students who do not know what to do what they want after graduation and ended up not working on the field they did in college. The common ground was they failed to plan.

Sometimes it seems to be pointless especially if nothing that we planned worked out. The universe may have other plans for you but do not fall into that trap of not planning just because nothing is conspiring.

Plan even if plan Z did not work out. Force yourself into a habit of planning before you sleep and right after you wake up. It makes a lot of difference.

December 11: a star (shining the brightest is the goal)

What if we become stars when we die?

What if we shine the brightest when we make a significant impact on others’ lives? What if as a star above we see the changes we made using the best that we have on Earth while we were alive?

Are we going to shine the brightest?

Are we going to be the proudest star seeing how the life we’ve lived improved the lives of future generations?

If our answers were mostly yes, I am pretty sure we are on the right track and we should keep doing what we are doing.

Otherwise, we have to reevaluate what we have and how we are living our lives and find ways to be better.

December 10: routine (will save you on days that you are not motivated)

I woke up today with energy to start the day and be productive. I attended the Sunday mass but I ended up having no motivation to do anything on my to-do list.

This is the consequence of not having a routine. Not everyday we will be motivated to be a better person but a well-built routine will save you on days that you are not motivated and give you the discipline – without routine, there will be no discipline.

December 9: worth it (really?)

When things are easy it is easy to say that it is worth it. However, if we struggle to get things right we question ourselves, will this be worth it? As I mentioned in my previous post, the past is in the past and so is the future. At this very moment, we are clueless whether we are fighting the right battles or not.

So, is it worth it? To answer that you must know what you want yourself to be in the future. Simple life? Not-so-simple life? Is there other route to get what I want without struggling? I guess regardless of which way you go, challenges are inevitable. They create growth. And without growth the future looks scary.

Maybe it will be worth it. Maybe not. The thing that your future self will thank you is that you tried even if it is frightening and giving you sweaty palms. Old people will tell you that the most regretful things they have done were the ones they did not.

25 Things I Can Give a Boy this Christmas

I grew up with two brothers and my dad. I also got some guy friends. And, every year I would always struggle on what to give them because I want something that will be useful for them. Below are things you may consider giving them. Most of them were gifts I have given a guy at some point, and I saw these things useful for them.

1. Bluetooth speaker

2. Airtag

3. Leather wallet

4. Backpack

5. Hoodie

6. Tumbler

7. Tools

8. Mechanical keyboard

9. Cap

10. T-shirt

11. Socks

12. Coffee maker

13. Air fryer

14. Customized phone case

15. Swiss knife

16. Charger

17. Belt bag

18. Small wallet

19. Razor

20. Board game

21. Console game

22. Notebook

23. Fountain pen

24. Keyboard/mouse pad

25. App subscription

If you think that you already gave all these to that guy, you can opt to giving him a gift card for him to decide what he needed or wanted.

Before you decide think twice if they mentioned that they need this or if you have seen them using this before. You do not want to give your guy friend a board game if he is more of a video gamer. You know him more than me. LOL.